As Dave and I are navigating our lives through this process of progressive aphasia with mental impairment, he is teaching me it is futile to reason, to explain, or to justify. All that rational thinking takes my energy and I become drained before 10 Am.
Yet what I have discovered is a place, a state of mind that I call “The Pace of Grace.” I am reminded when we first moved to Florida from Michigan, we thought everyone was so laid back and the pace of life was slower. As we visited Hawaii, this Mahalo, Aloha, attitude is embedded in the people of Hawaii and is contagious.
Aphasia like dementia causes Dave to “be on the move” always. Although I do attempt to engage him in focusing on something he will do for ten minutes like coloring, for the most part his frenetic energy keeps him moving, picking up things and putting them elsewhere. I’m attempting to adapt his environment to accommodate his altered reality.
I’ve met some supportive people through the Alzheimer’s Association and they are giving me a Jiobit, which is a tracker on my I Phone so I can see where he is walking. He has a tendency to insist on walking out of the house and with the tracker I’ll be able to let him walk down the street. Hopefully, he will be starting at the Alzheimer’s Day Care next week and that will also engage him in activities.
I appreciate how on Sundays so many of you have helped me when he starts to leave the sanctuary.
The Spiritual awareness that has deepened in me is when I let myself live at the Pace of Grace, I am letting everything unfold and evolve in its right time. The Pace of Grace is where I am taking momentary pauses between every activity I may be engaged in and listening as intuition guides me. Like the inhalation and exhalation of breath, there is a pause. Likewise, living in a state of grace is letting myself be lived by the Flow of Life and then I can appreciate all the many, many things Dave and I still enjoy together.
Blessings on this Journey